Nicked from DBC..

Subject: Nicked from DBC.. Fri Jul 12, 2013 7:05 pm

I took my new girlfriend home to meet my parents the other day. After saying hello my Dad pulled me to one side and whispered really quietly "For Fucks sake son, you could have done better than that. She's the ugliest pig I've ever seen! She must weigh 23 stone. Covered in spots. lips like a cod, shes got a beard, shes cross eyed, got a bald head, size 15 feet and she f*****g stinks!!"

I said "there's no need to whisper dad she's deaf!..."

Subject: Re: Nicked from DBC.. Fri Jul 12, 2013 7:07 pm

A bloke brings his best mate home after work to meet his wife.
His wife screams "You f*****g d******d, my hair and make-up are a mess,
the house is a right f*****g tip, the dishes aren't done, I'm still in my pyjamas,
I can't be bothered to cook and it's my time of the month!".
"Why the f**K did you bring him home?".
The husband replies "Because he was thinking of getting married".

Subject: Re: Nicked from DBC.. Fri Jul 12, 2013 8:43 pm

Subject: Re: Nicked from DBC.. Sat Jul 13, 2013 1:58 am

Mclane wrote:: A bloke brings his best mate home after work to meet his wife.
His wife screams "You f*****g d******d, my hair and make-up are a mess,
the house is a right f*****g tip, the dishes aren't done, I'm still in my pyjamas,
I can't be bothered to cook and it's my time of the month!".
"Why the f**K did you bring him home?".
The husband replies "Because he was thinking of getting married".

Nice one Paul lol!